I've been feeling a little guilty lately and I need some advice to know if there is anything to that guilt.
So, I'm training for the half Ironman. With that comes hours of exercise and time. Now, I take Morgan with me on bike rides and running and she seems to love it. My guilt comes with swimming three times a week. I have to take her to the gym daycare and I usually leave her for an hour, again, three times a week. She doesn't particularly love it there because she is away from me so she ends up crying for probably the majority of that hour. I take her fun toy and some food so she's distracted and sometimes that works, but other times she is just sad to be left.
Then Tom and I need a date night so we get a babysitter for a few hours one night a week.
Is that too much? Is this something I should quit doing? Am I normal to feel guilty for leaving her? Is she going to grow up with abandonment issues? Is it okay to leave her for a few hours every week plus date night? Your help and comments are greatly appreciated.
1 year ago
9 comments:
"Sunnie" will survive without too much of an abandonment issue (just kidding!) when you leave her in a daycare for an hour three times a week.
You're so cute, Kell! You're an EXCELLENT mom!!! You give 24/7 to her and it's good for you to have goals and dreams; they don't go away because one has a child.
Heck! Tons of mothers leave their children at daycares 8 hours or more a day while they work and then go out on date nights as well!
Separation is a big issue for little kids, but they soon get over it after they've grown accostumed to the place and know that you will be returning:-)
Go win that race!!!
Good grief! I can't believe I missed your anniversary!!! I have it on my calendar! Great to hear it was a lovely day. We sure LOVE having you in our family!!!
Love ya!!!
hi kelli!! you know what?? I NEVER leave my kids-- and I kind of wish that I could. I don't think Quinn has ever been left with anyone other other dave or my sister-in-law (and even those times are rare). and since we put my kids to bed at 6:30, they don't even know when we have a date night. but I think because of that Quinn FREAKS out when I leave her. She is almost 3 and nursery is still an issue. so i think you are fine-- get morgan used to it. we all need some time away for our own mental health! I guess I've just always figured that my kids are only babies for a very short time and I don't want someone else watching them for me... but that doesn't mean I think you are doing the wrong thing-- I think it's totally normal to leave your baby, especially for such a short time. i think in the long run, you will be glad you did.
definitely okay and healthy for the both of you. you are a wonderful, adoring mother and i don't feel you should have guilt at all!
hopefully it will maker her nursery transition easier when it comes time:)
I guess if you are a bad mom, then I'm HORRIBLE! :) I have to go into work for several hours a week, and I have to leave my little guy. It's hard, but I know that it's good for him to be around other people besides me, to help him to be well-rounded. I also HAVE to have my 2 hours of aerobics a week, so he gets left with Ryan. I think that we have to do things for ourselves, it helps us to be better mothers in the long run! That's how I justify it anyway! :) Good luck with the Ironman! I was training for the sprint Tri when I got prego with Coop, and one day, I'll actually do it! :) Miss ya!
Don't feel guilty. I think it's important that you get some time to yourself (and three hours a week is quite minimal)! It's not like you're leaving her to go to a bar (unless that's where you go on date night ;)), you're taking care of your body (even though you are an over achiever in this area)! Again, don't feel guilty. It's probably good for little Morgan!
I think that it's good for both of you too. (Truthfully, I'm a little jealous:)Someone once told me that's it's good for kids to understand that when Mommy and Daddy leave, they will always come back. If that makes sense, although this is probably more useful for nursery-aged kids. Anyways, you shouldn't feel guilty, a happy Mom makes a happy home and that's the most important thing for children.
Hello! I'm away from Andie 7am till 4:30 every weekday...so, I think I have you beat! Morgan needs to be socialized...that's why you are coming here! Ha! You are definitely a good mom b/c you are unnecessarily worrying about it! You funny girl!
Kelli you're a great mom Morgan won't have any abandonment issues. She's just having a little seperation anxiety that will slowly get better in time it's normal Kiana had and still has the same thing going on when i leave her at the babysitters while i'm away at school during the week.
Hey I think it is normal to feel guilty. I know that I do even sometimes when I leave my kids with Gary. But it is ok. She will get past this stage of always needing you there and then it will be fun for her. I think it is great that you have a goal and that you are working toward it. A few hours a week will not hurt her.
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